Tuesday, August 19, 2014

4.5 years Since my Fucking Horrible post

Out of no where I began to think of this blog I have neglected for many years. Months and years passed and I found it too painful to relive our struggles with Ava. 

Many have asked - does it get better? 4.5 years later, 2 hospitalizations, numerous behavioral therapists, 3 pdocs later, a confirmed diagnosis due to mania triggered from an antidepressant increase, death threats from her, physical abuse by her, violent rages, police visits, Child Services investigations of me and NO, not a bit easier.  Life with Ava is as it has always been, a tireless battle. But my husband and I refuse to give up. We tell her we will never give up and therefore she never will either. I view myself as a mother of a child with special needs. She will never be "the norm" - our lives with Ava will never be "the norm."  But there's a reason she chose me as her mother and I refuse to let her down. My mom used to tell me, "This too shall pass." I'll pass this down to my children. I'll never be able to fix her but damn if I'll ever stop trying. 

6 comments:

  1. I am working on a blog on this very same topic, which is how I came across your blog. My son is 14, and is currently in a residential treatment center the majority of the time, but we have been through the ringer these last 14 years. I have long since thought there was such a lack of support parenting a bipolar child and that no one tells it like it is. Thank you for sharing your story and inspiring me to push on and hopefully help others in their journey.

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  2. I plan to go back and read your previous posts, but feel free to reach out to me if you ever need to chat. :) My first blog post is up. If you want to read it and offer any feedback, please do.
    http://unbreakable-bipolarson.blogspot.com/2015/04/a-brief-recap.html

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  3. Just found your blog and it was literally a life line for me tonight. Such a three days with rages....Today I just feel spent and tired of it all. I do long for more mom support. I hope you will keep writing!

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  4. I just came across your blog. My daughter's name is also Ava. I feel your pain. Every day you wake up and never know what you're going to be faced with! Some days we are seemingly normal and other days..... well, those are the scary days. From one mom to another, keep our heads held high and keep fighting the good fight!

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  6. We need to start a bipolar mommy support group, I have a 15 year old daughter with bipolar and I really need all the support I could get, we all do..add me on Facebook if you'd like and we'll go from there

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